The woman next to me is kind of freaking me out.

After this morning’s slight amusement of her incessant need to show me exactly where everything is, for example:

1. Temp: “Where is the Kitchen?” to which she replies, “Oh, it’s just… well, let me show you…” subsequently we walk across the three foot hall, and through the door that reads "kitchen" into the Kitchen. Viola.

2. Or, “um…where is the copy room?” Instead of responding, “well, it’s exactly where it is on every floor,” which would have suited me just fine, I get “Oh, it’s… well, let me show you,” and I find that it’s exactly where I thought it would be; in fact, I really don’t know why I asked. Voila.

3. and finally in a manic display of benevolence, she offers, “Oh, here is the women’s bathroom and the men’s bathroom, and here is the coffee in the kitchen, and some forks if you need them and the paper toweks are just over there,” exactly the way it is on every floor; "And I have M&Ms at my desk... if you want them." Got it… voila.

But, now, she is staring at a spot on her desk, where there doesn’t appear to be anything. I’ve asked her how to use the intercom three time now, yet she hasn't moved – her back to me and head slightly cocked.

“Carol?” I think that’s her name: that’s what it says on the little plaque by her desk.
“Carol? Um… how do you use the intercom on this phone?”

Nothing. “Carol?”

Nothing. I get up from my desk and peek around the other side of the small wall that separates us. Is she on the phone? I look. No phone. Just imaginary object of fascination on desk.

I return to my desk. I decide to ask the question a different way: “The intercom? how do you use it?” Nothing.

Alright. This is just silly.

“How would one use the intercom if one were so inclined?”

Nothing. I wait three seconds… “So, the intercom, um, how’s it work. The intercom here?” I stand up slightly and point to my phone.

She blinks from the focus of her concentration and slowly looks back; with an eerily-responsive tone, she says “you just press IC, then the number of the person you want to reach.”

Whoa. “Thanks." Slightly concerned, "It is Carol right?”

“Yep.” She points to her name plaque and then quickly returns to that spot on her desk.

For sanity’s sake, I’m just going to forget that happened.